I don’t know whether if you’ll ever speak any other language than English my darling daughter, therefore i am starting this list and English i shall use.

But if you will ever be curious enough to find out more about your mother i leave you this blog. it goes way back to my careless days but i’m afraid that for the older ones you will have to learn Romanian.  I know it is not easy,  but trust me, it’s slightly easier to learn than Hungarian.

So here i am , here we are, you are sound asleep in bed with your dad as i begin to put these words down , it’s a few days before Christmas and 2018 has not been a good year. I lost my mother , your Buni this year and words cannot ever be enough to describe the pain i feel every day , not even if i were to be the best poet or writer who has ever walked the earth..  It’s you my love, you keep me connected now, around you revolves my whole universe and i hope i will show you at least half the love my own mother showed me. Then, with this hope, i will live through the rest of my days .

I love you. i’ll tell it to you everyday, even when i shout at you , even when i feel sad. i hope you will know this and feel it stronger than any other feeling. i am here always. You are the most beautiful part of me and no matter what or who comes into your life, know that your mother is always with you and will always love you . No matter what.

Now, about family: You have one. Beyond mom and dad, beyond whomever you will fall in love with and maybe marry one day, you have cousins and aunts and uncles and great uncles and aunts and at this moment, today, 3 loving grandparents and 1 quite amazing angel watching over you. Even though they all live far away, they will always receive you with open arms. All of them.One message away. Should you ever find yourself alone and scared, never hesitate to look them up.

And here it is : the reason for this list. I want you to always feel safe and not ever alone. Be strong my dear and brave. You’ve got everything else already.

Love, mom.